Rethinking New Year Resolutions: Why a Program and Embodied Statements are the Key to Lasting Change
- Kellie Ward
- Jan 7
- 4 min read
Every January, millions of people set New Year's resolutions with high hopes for change. Yet, most of these resolutions fail within weeks or months. The reason is simple: they lack focus, intention, and a clear plan to follow through. Saying “I want to lose weight” or “I will exercise more” often serves as a temporary feel-good statement rather than a rooted commitment. This post explores why traditional New Year resolutions rarely work and offers a practical alternative: putting yourself on a program with embodied statements and a strong why to create lasting change.
Why New Year's Resolutions Often Fail
New Year's resolutions usually start with good intentions but quickly lose momentum. The main reasons include:
Lack of clear focus: Resolutions tend to be broad and vague, such as “get healthier” or “save money.” Without a specific target, it’s hard to measure progress or stay motivated.
No intention or plan: Saying a resolution out loud or writing it down doesn’t create a roadmap. Without a plan, old habits easily creep back.
Superficial motivation: Many resolutions are based on surface-level desires like looking better or pleasing others, which don’t provide enough depth to sustain the desired change.
Guilt and pressure: When resolutions fail, people often feel guilty or disappointed, which can lead to giving up entirely.
These factors create a cycle where resolutions become empty promises, leading to frustration and a sense of failure.
The Power of a Program
Instead of relying on vague resolutions, consider putting yourself on a program. A program means you commit to a clear, structured approach with specific steps and goals. This approach helps you:
Create focus: Choose one domain of your life to work on, such as health, relationships, or personal growth.
Build intention: Define exactly what you want to change and why it matters deeply to you.
Develop habits: Programs encourage consistent actions that replace old behaviours with new ones.
Track progress: Having measurable milestones keeps you motivated and accountable.
For example, instead of saying “I want to eat healthier,” a program might look like this:
Plan meals every Sunday for the week ahead.
Replace sugary snacks with fruits or nuts.
Drink a glass of water before each meal.
Track daily food intake using a journal or app.
This clear structure makes it easier to follow through and see real progress.
Substituting Old Behaviours with Preferred Ones
Changing behaviour is not just about stopping something negative; it’s about replacing it with a preferred action. When you remove a habit, you create a gap. If this gap isn’t filled, the old behaviour or another negative habit will fill it again.
Here’s how to plug that gap effectively:
Identify the behaviour you want to change.
Choose a positive behaviour to replace it (often it is the reverse of the negative behaviour).
Practice the new behaviour consistently.
Use reminders or cues to reinforce the change, such as breaking the chain habit-building apps.
For instance, if you want to stop checking your phone first thing in the morning, replace it with a short meditation or stretching routine. This substitution keeps your mind and body engaged in a healthier habit.
Some of my favourite apps for rhythm building are:
Duolingo for learning a language
Fito for health and fitness
Word Keeper for book writing
Water Lama for hydration
Blue Heart for relationship therapy
Habitica for RPG gamifying your life and building rhythms
The Role of Embodied Statements
An embodied statement is a powerful phrase you repeat to yourself that captures your commitment and values around the change you want to make. It helps you shut down old behaviours when they start to creep in.
Examples include:
“I will not set myself on fire to keep others warm.”
“I never quit.”
“My home is like another person that I need to care for; I will not neglect it.”
These statements work because they:
Anchor your intention: They remind you why you are making the change.
Create mental resistance: When the old habit tries to return, the statement helps you stop it.
Build values: Over time, you start to see yourself as the kind of person who lives by that statement, which increases your confidence in yourself and who you want to be.
To develop your embodied statement, you need to know your why deeply.
Finding Your Why
Your why is the meaningful reason behind your desire to change. It must go beyond superficial goals like “looking better” or “losing weight.” A strong why connects to your values and the impact you want to have.
For example, instead of saying “I want to lose weight to look better,” try:
“I want to lose weight so I can show up fully for the people I love and maximise my body’s potential.”
This is why it carries more weight and helps sustain motivation during challenges.
Putting It All Together: A Practical Approach
Here’s a step-by-step guide to replace your New Year's resolution with a program and embodied statement:
Choose one area to focus on: Pick a domain in your life where you want to see change.
Define your why: Write down a meaningful reason that connects emotionally and practically.
Create a program: Outline specific actions, habits, and milestones and a plan on how you are going to do it.
Develop an embodied statement: Craft a phrase that captures your commitment and values.
Practice consistently: Use your program daily and repeat your embodied statement when old habits arise.
Track progress: Keep a journal or log to celebrate wins and adjust as needed.
What to Do When You Get Stuck
Change is rarely smooth. If you find yourself slipping back into old habits:
Revisit your why and embodied statement.
Reflect on what triggered the slip and plan how to handle it next time.
Adjust your program if it feels too hard or unclear.
Seek support from friends, coaches, or communities.
As always, I'm here for you if you get stuck or need a little extra boost.
Warmest,
Kellie
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